


dumb writings

by yummybread



Category: No Fandom
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:19:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 1,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29295039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yummybread/pseuds/yummybread





	1. time

time doesn’t stop for anyone.

not for you, not for me.

not for anyone, or anything.

it keeps going.

you can’t go back and change anyone.

you can’t go back and change anything.

you can’t do anything now.

did you want your questions answered?

did you want your thoughts confirmed?

it's too late.

the clock is ticking.

sorry.


	2. rotting

the sound of a fan  
the light of a TV  
the mess of it all is stressful

trash can overflowing  
weeks of laundry piled up  
dishes stacked on the nightstand

unable to get out of bed  
unable to cry at this point  
unable to do anything except watch videos

silently suffering in the box called a room,  
rotting away into nothing.


	3. food

shoveling food down one by one

it doesn’t matter if it’s healthy or not  
it doesn’t matter what the serving size is  
it doesn’t matter that this can tear the esophagus

chips  
apples  
even ice cubes

yet nothing is satisfying

is it really hunger?  
or just a coping mechanism that’ll never satisfy?

it doesn’t matter  
there’s no more food  
there’s nothing left to eat

this sucks.


	4. difficulty

hard to think

hard to breathe

hard to stop shaking

unable to say anything except the same apology over and over

stuck in a broken body wracked with trauma and pain with no way out


	5. pain

a pain in the heart  
an infection in the brain  
vision blurred with unwanted tears and skin made unrecognizable

you cant give up when it gets rough,  
so just sit with it and bear it until it gives you a break.


	6. box

four enclosed walls  
two useless doors  
one closed window

all trapping air into a locked, small space  
thick walls making it impossible for anyone to hear

hazelnut candles keeping the space calm  
light-emitting diodes lighting up the darkness  
a mobile fan at top-speed blocking out the sounds

food and water kept within while a TV with no signal stays blue screened

an isolation for one with no will left  
a safe space for one with nobody to talk to  
a home for one who cannot stand to exist in their own flesh

it’s lonely, but it's a familiar emptiness one endures.


	7. us

listening to music together over call  
spilling secrets and creating new ones

making silent promises  
sending stuff through mail

pupils dilated  
stomach fluttering

one day, my darling.  
just hold on.


	8. pathway

waking up from another gory nightmare or severe headache

loss of appetite causing a chain reaction of starvation

running out of tissues within a few days

feeling the consciousness slip from the brain like water through hands

they say this is a chosen path,  
but who willingly chooses to be this way?


	9. demolish

sun shines through a broken curtain

a heart beats full of love  
messages being received  
only to find it’s not sweet

it’s not loving  
it’s not caring  
it's a long-awaited yet achingly slow goodbye

within a second the heart falters and cracks

it burns  
it hurts  
it feels like death will fully embody you until there’s nothing more than a couple bones

the mind goes crazy  
the heart breaks  
the body freezes

eyes close, and sleep takes over  
because at least when one is asleep, they can’t feel the pain of the waking world.


	10. agony

a slow phone and a barely functioning brain is the only thing that can keep one sane  
the pleads of the broken one yet to be heard

needing time  
needing patience

mentally torture the broken one until they have no choice but to punch the ticket  
it wasn’t that hard to be nice, yet here we are.


	11. pacing

pacing around what one calls a box

time ticks, candles melt

everything left to hide

so much left to do

yet all one can do is pace

it’s the one thing that can’t be done wrong


	12. white lies

headaches from a supposed cold  
doing things multiple times just because  
having poor attention span simply due to the task  
marks all over from angering a cat whom lives within the home

there is nothing to worry about  
nothing to diagnose  
nothing to talk about  
nothing to notice

cross those fingers and fake that smile!  
they won’t find out for a while.


	13. heat source

comforting warmth that holds one through the day  
keeps one grounded from a fading mind  
a body that is FUBAR can be distracted by the welcoming heat source

but they have taken it.  
they have tainted the heat source the broken one needed--the one thing that kept the waters calm.

shaking hands reach to rip at the scalp

they tainted the living space and the air, and now the thing that held one’s hand.  
they infected it with their germs.

little flesh cells of their’s crawling around, waiting to infest the broken one  
the broken one knows better than to trust the enemy, the broken one knows better than to rely on something temporary

the box is cold now, but it is safe.


	14. complications

if the back is turned, the broken one’s doom will be met  
if the door is not locked, they will kill the broken one  
if the light is off, the scary will show themselves

the towel must stay down  
the television must be covered  
the blinds must stay permanently shut

it is okay as long as the mind is quiet


	15. love

love isn’t about having money, nor do you have to love yourself first  
love is about two imperfect beings helping each other out

it’s not about cheating on the project, it’s taking time and doing the best you can

love doesn’t care for timing or gender  
love can be painful  
love will be confusing

but all in all,  
love is love.

treat it as such instead of being a prick who cares not for the heart, but for the bone.


	16. a fated night

there was a goddess roaming the land, a basket of lavender in hand  
the field was beautiful at night, but not as beautiful as they were  
it was the best time to come out, for no human was awake

no normal human at least.

they hear footsteps, a tune being hummed from within the forest  
the goddess cannot help themselves, submerging into the trees  
soon enough, they come to the source of it all

they make eye contact--could it even be considered that?

there had been rumors of this being  
they were lone and quiet, but if you weren’t careful you’d run into them  
they were said to be dangerous

but from this view, they didn’t seem much harm  
the broken one didn’t look to be a threat in the slightest.

their cat jumped from their shoulder and over to the goddess, while the broken one fixed posture and put on their glasses  
polar opposites is what they were, almost like god and satan  
one was a gorgeous beam of light, and the other was a sickly dim cloud

yet the goddess spoke, and took the broken one along with them

words and questions exchanged on the way back to the goddess’ planet, the cat fast asleep on their lap  
they found to be very similar.  
they found they enjoyed the other’s company

the height difference was no problem, neither was their immortality

curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.


	17. wilt

brought into the world only to be a trophy  
born to be of use with no other choice

but you cannot neglect a flower and expect it to grow into a beautiful bouquet  
it only hurts and destroys it, and then there are no more flowers to be seen

if you cannot understand how to care for a rose, maybe you shouldn’t have planted it in the first place


	18. uncomfy

it fits, but not correctly

it fits to the frame--the thing that one would rather mutilate than spare a glance at

crawl into the items five sizes too big, and sink into the tears

drown in the videos of distraction

maybe tomorrow will be better.


	19. doubt

duct tape over the mouth is like a secure hug

nothing could’ve happened, not to them

just a false memory they made up, like the experiments scientists do with snails

nothing happened

and nothing will happen

but if the duct tape keeps them from spilling falsehoods, why do they cry ?


	20. hatred

a strong, strong feeling towards someone who’s ruined you so bad you have to scrub your body down eight times to feel somewhat free of their grasp 

every sentence begins with hesitation and ends with an apology, either that or there’s no words to be spoken 

feel the heart sink as you watch a happy little girl hold hands with her mother, watch them smile and laugh together   
pray that she ends up nothing like this   
pray that the mother wanted her for the sole reason of wanting a child to love 

then walk right back into a place that’s never been home 

someone as horrid as this would never let you go willingly. you’ll have to run.


	21. fabrication

apologies only mean something if you improve your actions. 

you’re not sorry. 

you just miss your old toys.


	22. the way to go

wishing death upon the ones whom hurt you is a foolish action 

instead, wish your memory to stay with them 

wish that they remember every painful thing they put you through to the surface of their mind, but also wish them the best 

grow from the person they made you become and allow karma to take care of them 

walk away and relax your posture, for you're finally safe


End file.
